Today my extended family held the joint memorial service for my grandparents – who were married for 68 years. Their example was an inspiration to us all – they really lived their own advice to all the newlyweds, which was quite simple: “Hug and kiss – often!”
So this year’s Valentine’s Day feels rather unromantic. Not that I really think all that much of flowers-and-chocolate day. I don’t want more jewelry despite the blitz of advertising attempting to awake my avarice for shiny things; J gets me flowers as a concession to my desire for them (he doesn’t “get” flowers, they mystify him), and I made him a chocolate cheesecake. It came out really well this year too – no gaping fissures, and I actually piped the chocolate mouse into pretty swirls instead of spreading it on top to hide the crevasses like I usually do!
And for our unromantic Valentines Day dinner, we ate leftover lasagna from the memorial service lunch with my sister and her husband, who came over to hang out with us for the evening. Guess I’m not alone in not wanting to do some special “romantic” dinner on a day spent remembering our departed loved ones. In particular, I think it hit us two harder than our cousins because our grandparents were very involved in raising us after our mother died – they became a sort of surrogate parent pair, having us over at their retirement community home for whole, endless summers in the high country surrounded by farms. Going back always feels like coming home in a way that visiting my parents’ house never does – but I suppose that’s nostalgia for you. We never had to do boring tedious things like school up there, after all!