Best election commentary

Stilicho, replying to something upthread:

And Karl D wrote in Cthulhu, so perhaps change will come.

Yes, but he spelled it wrong…which will only lead to post-election litigation in which the Democrat candidate will claim that he is actually Cthulhu based upon his policy positions (abortion, euthanasia, tax-slavery, etc.) and the Republican candidate will claim that either Cthulu or Cthulhu is ineligible because he/it is not a citizen, which, in turn, will rouse La Raza, the ACLU, the ADL and the UNCF to file amicus briefs claiming that no creature is illegal and that the long history of white men oppressing and enslaving demon spawn and the Lords of the Outer Dark via various summoning spells (exhibit A: the Malleus Maleficarum, Exhibit B: The Necronomicon) requires that fixed quotas of demons be elected in proportion to their percentage of the population of the Eighth Cirlce of Hell. Naturally, once his name has been invoked a sufficient number of times, Cthulhu will rise from his long slumber and devour the litigants, but indigestion will likely cause him to retire before he inflicts any actual harm.



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