Real vs Valid

I wandered about the links from this Insty post discussing the emotions of men who go through the culturally-approved motions and develop the culturally-approved attitudes and yet don’t end up with the promised reward (a girlfriend who appreciates him for Who He Is). This is the male mirror of this kind of woman, who also did everything her culture told her was The Right Thing To Do and yet didn’t end up with the promised reward (an attractive boyfriend). Of course, in the case of the woman, all she had to do was easily discard The Rules she grew up with, and because women have social power, she got what she wanted.

Our culture is more than a little screwed up about sex right now.

But there’s a lot of people talking about that and you can go read those links, so what I’m going to proceed to talk about is this post of the Star Slate Codex (never heard of it before, but I think I shall spend some time exploring) which points out the intrinsic hypocrisy of the social justice warriorwhiner crowd, which uses highfalutin’ ideals as cover for naked power-grabbing. This is why I have developed a severe allergy to social justice warriorswhiners, to the extent that I would like to deport them all to a place like Venezuela or Cambodia, where they can live short, brutal, ugly lives with others of their kind – unrealistic utopians.

This also reminds me of a link seen on Facebook – Y U No Believe In My Victimhood?! As you can see with my creative reinterpretation of the article title, whatever valid point this woman has to make is buried under her own solipsism (a cop pulled you over While Driving A Red Car and you were scared by the mean cops? And you think that’s an example of racism?!) and failure to actually bring up any real-world examples of a black person Doing Everything Right and yet still being Held Down By The Racist White Man. Or even any statistics that show how people with “traditional” black names get hired less by white-owned companies, or something. (Has anyone ever done the equivalent test with black-owned companies? Asian-owned companies? Hispanic-owned companies? Because I would be willing to bet that human tribalism exists in all cases.) The constant whining has poisoned the well. I feel bad for black people who have to suffer unearned prejudice on an individual level, but on a group level? Zero sympathy for abstract group whining.

So: real vs valid? I freely acknowledge that the feelbad – fear, anxiety – of minorities really does exist. Especially in the black community, where they tell each other all the time about how racist and mean and out-to-get-us those white people are. When you’re priming yourself to feel antagonistic and fearful towards The Other, particularly an Other that outnumbers you and has a tendency of giving you shiny handouts for voting a certain way while ignoring all your actual problems, why yeeeeeeees, you’re going to feel afraid any time some big ole meanieface comes along and doesn’t use exquisite manners and deference in your presence.

That doesn’t mean that your emotions are valid responses to reality, though. That’s the thing about emotional states – they are very real, but not always valid. For instance, arachnophobia is real, but being deathly afraid of a tiny jumping spider is not a valid response to seeing one. (You have my permission to scream and kill it anyway, if it makes you feel better, though. Spiders aren’t people, and they’re not allowed where I can see them in my house, either.)

So here’s the thing: if you want to effectively fight the feelbad, making blanket statements using SJW intra-tribal signaling keywords is not the way to do it. Shut up about privilege and labeling “feeling uncomfortable” as evidence of racism, and only bring up racism when you see actual evidence of someone who (a) knows that you personally are not a threat and (b) treats you like scum anyway. NAME NAMES. BE SPECIFIC. Otherwise you’re a whiner. A pair of cops come up to you with their hands on their guns during a routine traffic stop, and you feel scared? That’s a perfectly valid emotional response to that situation, but not because of racism! Making it about racism just waters down “racism” to “anything negative that happens to a black person” – but here’s the thing, life is full of frustrations and not everyone is always going to like you! (And a lot of cops are bullies.) In addition, there’s a high likelihood that you’re going to be treated suspiciously by The Other if your tribe has a reputation for flipping out and assaulting people, and that’s just on top of the usual surly everyone-hates-everyone-else attitude that’s fairly common in densely populated areas. Feel free to complain about this all you like, but don’t take those complaints out in public and start telling white people to change how they act when you’ve got members of your tribe assaulting and gang-shooting, etc. each other and the occasional random unlucky Others on a daily basis. 

A part of this, the honest useful-idiot part, is a plea to please acknowledge my difficulties. That’s still whining, because other people have difficulties too, but it’s not deportation-to-Cambodia-here’s-your-glasses level of stupid. What is hypocritical and anger-inspiring is the “privileged” attitude that says a black person’s feelings are more important than a white person’s feelings, simply because black people are a minority in this part of the world. Those cops with hands on their guns? Maybe they went out on a DV call last night and nearly got assaulted by some chick who looks a lot like you – like the spider, they’re afraid of you just as you’re afraid of them. Their emotional response to you is just as real as your emotional response to them. 

But of course, it’s oh so much safer to criticize white people for “having privilege” and being insensitive to the feeeeelings of minorities than black thugs for being criminals and giving the black community a much worse rap than, say, the Asian community, despite all the fear mongering tales about how evil white people are. White people rarely aggressively attack black people for criticizing them; nobody can say the same for the bad actors in the black community. Far more comfortable to criticize the civilized, who will listen to you, than to clean up the barbarians in your midst – especially when the barbarians have lots of friends with knives and guns and Really Big Fists and social cover for being “authentic,” and you don’t have any of those things. Just don’t expect me to give you any respect whatsoever if you think you have a right to criticize somebody else’s tribe when you turn a blind eye to the much bigger problems in your own – problems that have only gotten worse even as actual institutional racism has been made illegal to the point where even the appearance of institutional racism (“disparate impact”) is a good way to get slammed with huge legal judgments.

If you have specific things to complain about, like how government crony regulation hurts your community’s opportunity to build your own businesses in the ‘hood and how some particular person is an Evil Racist, by all means, bring that up and let’s work to fix it. But don’t go on about systemic-this and subtle-that and “institutional racism” (in the day and age of affirmative action and minority-only set-asides!) as if some kind of nebulous white disapproval of dark-colored skin is responsible for every setback black people have ever faced in life.

P.S. Feel free to take this entire diatribe and apply it equally to the man-blaming feminists, as well. Although in their case I would like to deport them to someplace like Iran. Because I am Not A Nice Person.

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About pancakeloach

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