I was bored (and procrastinating cleaning my kitchen, which makes me A Bad Person, I know) so I decided to go blog-diving in Dalrock’s archives. Whereupon I found this little gem:
Now I do have one question, as to the inner workings of normal females’ minds. As a female INTJ I’m basically a freak of nature, and I was raised by an INTJ father which is basically freak-of-nature squared or “raised by wolves.” No makeup til sixteen house rule? At sixteen I made the great concession to femininity of plucking my massive, McDonald’s-arch eyebrows into a more aesthetically-pleasing pair of arcs, but you couldn’t get me to wear makeup or get my ears pierced. Family joke of arranged marriage? I’m pretty sure by sixteen I was demanding that my father produce the candidates every time he brought it up! Which worked a lot better at shutting down that line of thought than my younger, more typically-feminine sister’s vociferous protests. Which wasn’t fair, because I was serious. LOL
So: do normal females actually know when they’re head over heels in love, or is Dalrock talking about lust-fueled infatuation here? Because I didn’t experience any Disney-type “I’m in luuuuuuuuuurve” moments and probably would have appreciated a Greek muse chorus while J and I were “dating.” But I did have my family saying “How happy you are!” pretty constantly when we were courting and after the wedding – guess that was my chorus! And, well, if I’d felt a lust-fueled infatuation I probably would have run the other way, honestly. Observation of social interactions had already led me to the conclusion that no male who inspired such an instant physical response was to be trusted under any circumstances. But I did make sure to wrangle a beach day trip as one of our “dates” (so that I had a plausible excuse to see J in his swim trunks, mwahaha!) And our premarital counseling with my pastor did actually bring that up: “You guys do want to have sex with each other, right? Otherwise you shouldn’t be getting married.” 😄
Or maybe my “confusion” over this was just due to the fact that I never dated before embarking on courtship and marriage?* Hmm. Well, in any case, women, if you know that you aren’t in love with him and you’re not looking forward to romps in the sheets with him, you should start over with a different guy. You don’t want to turn into Jenny Erikson, after all.
*Told you I was a freak of nature, di’nt I? And now I must go clean my kitchen.